christmas party

Every year at the Christmas party I go to we get to see this exact performance:


I am in fact in this video. Where's Waldo?

Well next year I'm going to try to convince my sister to do this number at the party. I think we'd knock 'um dead.

the beyond department

I have a new-ish retail job and it's become an interesting part of my life. I've turned each shift into a game. We, as cashiers, are required to ask many annoying questions to each customer. Here's my schpiel: "Hi there! Did you find everything ok today? Can I tempt you into purchasing a Poach Pod or a cookie dough scoop today? You don't know what a Poach Pod is? Well let me demonstrate. You set the pods in your shallow pan of water on the stove and crack your eggs in there and poach them like you would regularly and when you're done you just throw them in the top rack of the dishwasher. And these cookie dough scoops are cool too! They have a nice sharp edge that helps you get through the raisins and the oatmeal and then you just push the back and they pop right out onto your tray! Do you need any gift cards or gift receipts today? And is any of this from our bridal registry? Ok have a great day!"
Wow I'm exhausted. But recently I decided to make it into a joke. I try to sound as much like an infomercial as possible and the customers love it. I'm actually starting not to hate it so much. It's the nice customers that make it worth while. For example: today one lady asked me which laptop tray I liked better and I convinced her to buy the more expensive one (not on purpose) and she said "My you are a good sales-woman!" Then later I helped her figure out that she would save more by using a 20% off coupon than by using a $5 off coupon and she said "Wow, not only are you a good sales woman, but you're funny and smart too!"
It's the nice ones that make it not so dreadful.

winter

I have to stay up here over break for work. At first I thought it was going to be nice to be alone, but now I'm realizing that I'm going to be bored out of my mind. It's hard to cook for only one person. Today I made enough soup for a whole army. I also volunteered for an extra shift at work, which is sick. On the one hand it's nice because I get to come home to the quiet and I can read or watch a movie, basically whatever I want. I also don't have to talk to anyone, which at first sounds depressing but after 5 strait hours of using my retail-voice it's nice to not talk. Sometimes I want to do this -->

But there are those other times where I feel like this -->


I think I'm funny.