senior year

The good thing about being a senior in college is that you get to take classes that are interesting. This quarter I'm taking a class from my favorite professor, The Ecology of Human Variation. He's hysterical and luckily for both of us there is a girl in the class who's intelligence I'm questioning. Here is a blip from class today. Enjoy. We were making a chart about how humans use their energy and we had "reproduction" under an activity and then our teacher put it as it's own category to represent sexual maturation. This is the conversation that followed.(I copied that picture exactly from the white board.)

Student: "but you already have that under 'activities'."

Teacher: "Think about it now. The activity part of reproduction is...going to the sock-hop..."

*laughter*

Girl: "What about socialization? I mean, humans have to socialize."

Teacher: "Well, that would be this..." (He puts a star next to 'reproduction' in the activities section)

*lull in conversation*

Girl: "What about grooming?!"

Teacher: (Puts a dot next to 'reproduction').

*laughter*

She was lost.

winter quotes

Sorry I haven't been posting. This should make you feel better.

"It's not quite sex, drugs, and rock n' roll but it's close" ~Archaeology Professor

"I think we can all agree that we don't want our sex organs on the ground." ~Bio Prof

"There's an egg and a sperm...and a magic moment occurs." ~Bio Prof

"I'm just teaching you how to be obnoxious and smart without really knowing anything." ~Bio Prof

"Students really seem to love multiple multiple choice exams, so that's what we'll be doing." ~Bio Prof (That's total bull by the way. Students HATE multiple multiple choice)

"I know the difference between a yam and a sweet potato. That was my pick up line in college." ~Bio Prof

"Ok I promised you some sex. We're getting there." ~Bio Prof

My biology professor has a stutter and I never find it funny until he gets stuck on the word "because" because it makes me think of the Wizard of Oz.

"Now I know I have a stutter and it can be problematic so if you don't understand what I'm saying just be like 'Hey Jeff, too many syllables not enough words.'"

things from my brain

I'm an obsessive note taker when it comes to life. I like to write down things as they happen. I like to make lists too. It's more like I have to make lists actually. If I don't then my brain thinks I need to remember all of these things and it wastes space in my brain's hard-drive. My notes and lists usually consist of quotes I like, thoughts I have, real life stories, etc. Right now I have to wait 10 more minutes before I can finish my online chemistry homework, so I thought I'd post my first set of life notes.

From Chemistry:

Professor: "Iron is my favorite element...is iron anyone else's favorite? OH COME ON! It's in your blood! It's like everywhere!"

Professor: "This[homework problem] is kind of an easy little plug and chug."

From Anthropology:

Professor: "We'll have a lecture about chimpanzees. Everything you ever wanted to know about chimpanzees. You'll laugh. You'll cry. You'll have to leave to go to the bathroom...I guarantee at least one but probably all three of those things will happen to you."

Professor: "...Canadians speak another language than us. It's very difficult to communicate with them."

Student [about exam]: "How heavy will the terminology be?"
Professor: "Very heavy. It's all written in words. Does that help?"

Professor: "We know this is the mother. How do we know? It came out of her! There's potential of a hospital switch...happens all the time."

Professor: "It's hard to text message with a hoof. I'm learning about that sort of thing."

Professor: "Well I've raced a jaguar..." I'm pretty sure he was talking about an actual jaguar.

Professor: "Hopefully there will be no other slides...nope two more. Damn."

Professor: "We are an ape...I'd hate to break it to...some of us..."

Professor: "It's pretty boring just reading the test questions to you...probably something ethically wrong with that. I dunno I'll have to check the handbook. I should probably do that more often."

Professor: "You're supposed to be anxious before a test right? That's good for learning."

Professor: "I can't tell you all the answers because then no one would get any wrong."

Professor: "I'm retarded."

From Biology:

Professor: "Enough fun right?"
Me: "That's what I always say."

Professor: "Let's turn on the lights so I can kinda see the whites of your eyes."
Me: "Well my whites are kinda red today so..."

Professor: "Males aren't really equipped to do anything by themselves."

Professor: "I don't mean to shut you down, but I am."

Thoughts:

My new softball mantra is "don't swing at crap."

During cell biology I'm am constantly suffering from information overload.

Serendipity is a beautiful word.

The zygomatic bone is my favorite bone, closely followed by the acetabulum.

Crepuscular. Who knew?

Extant is a funny word.

Further and farther are tricky.